Vacant

There’s a Vacancy for rent
lease unsecured by success.
High price paid forward
still room uninhabited.
Completed goals momentary respite
landlord evicts transient holder.
Indelible inadequacy exposed
laid bare to the host.
Shame obscures the view
personal value remains on trial.
Long term dividends withheld
the jury votes to acquit.
Sadness flows from years gone by as
future choice diminishes with age.
Unknown expands as time contracts,
there’s a Vacancy for rent.

Poem: I began writing with idea in mind feeling down about virus. I am still paying rent, working from home, all online. So, that room is empty. Then I was thinking about the many goals I have sought and achieved. There is a kind of emptiness that those successes, once reached, don’t fill up a certain spot. And, here I am trying to master this new thing called telehealth with all of the technology problems and the many challenges understanding each person under these new conditions. My beautiful room lies vacant.

I have been in private practice for 30+ years in San Diego, California. I am a Psychoanalyst and Supervisor and Training Analyst at San Diego Psychoanalytic Center. I have served as Progression and Education committee chairs, and for the last ten years have been totally devoted to Relational approaches. I have been involved in many groups and started a Relational group at
my center.